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So, my Sinful Sunday pic this past Sunday. Did you see it? Did it weird you out? I won’t repost it here but, for those who have not yet seen it and would like to, you can follow the link to take you to Crimson Splendour.

To be honest, I’ve had this picture idea for a while but hadn’t found the courage to do it, and although I think it turned out to be one of my best pictures I also think it may well be one of my most controversial. I can tell people have issue with it by the lack of comments and messages about it. My Sinful Sunday posts always generate some love and comments, but not this week. For some reason people tend to get weirded out by menstruation, something they consider to be a pesky monthly visitor.

I know some women get terrible cramping or nausea when they are on, or just about to be on, their periods. I can understand not feeling sexy or wanting to be sexually active when they aren’t feeling well. I wouldn’t want to have sex if I had those side effects with my periods. I’m lucky in that regard though. Aside from the scarlet red that flows between my legs I wouldn’t know it was happening. There has never been a cramp or pain or other ill effect from my period. Several years ago I started the practice of using a calendar to keep track of it as I’ve been surprised more times than I’d like by the appearance of a red spot, or more, on my undies. Although I am quite happy with the way they are I wouldn’t complain about a little heads up when it’s about to arrive.

One thing about my sex drive, I am just as horny when I am menstruating as I am any other time of the month, maybe even more so if that’s possible. I’m like a cat in heat when I have my period. My whore moans hormones go crazy and I am ready to pounce on just about any man within arms reach. Thank goodness I still have some of my wits about me.

I’ve often wondered if other women feel the same way during their time of the month. Some certainly must. I can’t believe that I am the odd one out on this. I was thinking about it the other day and I believe that my sex drive gets a boost from knowing that I am not pregnant when things start to flow. There is something more to it though. Menstruating is purely a female action. We can shed our insides, bleed every month, and still stay standing. It brings to mind a well known song, “I am woman hear me roar… I am strong, I am invincible, I am woman.”

When I was in my early teens I read a story from one of my sister’s magazines that has stuck with me. The young woman in the story was a play toy for the local football team. When she was menstruating though, none of the guys would go near her. Then she found a young man who didn’t care that she was on her period. He did the same things with her as he would do any other time. The last scene of the story was him going down on her, licking and fingering and eating away, on the back seat of a bus heading home after a game. She was on her period.

I loved that story. It was a revelation that men could, or would, play with me while I was on my period. Problem is though, many men are like those football players. They steer clear of you when you have your period. They think the “blood” is messy and dirty and don’t want any part of it. Truth is there is nothing harmful about playing while a woman is on her period. To quote Wikipedia, “Unless a woman has a blood borne illness, menstrual fluid is harmless. No toxins are released in menstrual flow, as this is a lining that must be pure and clean enough to have nurtured a baby. Menstrual fluid is no more dangerous than regular blood.”

Even in my world of kink and BDSM, where I wouldn’t have thought this was an issue, I have found fewer men who will play with a menstruating woman’s vagina than when I was dating more vanilla men. I find it odd that a man will cut you, stick needles in you, and enjoy blood play that way but won’t go near your vagina when it flows red. What’s the deal? Seems so silly and juvenile. If intercourse is part of your play then he should be wearing a condom. It will protect him from the unrealistic harm of your menstrual flow just as it protects from real threats such as sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy. If he doesn’t wear a condom because you are monogamous and trust each other, why does that go out the window when you are menstruating? The menstrual flow is no more harmful than saliva or regular pussy juices.

Stop being weirded out by menstruation. Throw an old towel down and have at it.

 

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Pussy Pride

 

Crimson Splendour

“It is courage, courage, courage, that raises the blood of life to crimson splendour.”
~ Horace

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You Rise

You rise
In the darkness of the night
The light
Too far off to save me
You move
Closer to me
Your hands
All over me
Your mouth
Searching
I wake
But barely
Still floating between sweet dream
And reality
I want
You
I need to feel you
To taste you
Just as you need the same
Of me
Hands stroke
And play
Pleading for more
I ache
To feel you
All of you
Where you belong
Where you crave to be
Inside of me
We play this game
Before the morning dawn
A game we both win
When
You rise

I Can Give You Flowers

Check out this post if you would like to have a little background context to this one.




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He was quiet the next two days before trying to initiate another conversation. I didn’t respond.

The third day he apologized again.

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I have not responded. That didn’t stop him from sending me a message on FetLife to tell me he received some new toys he had ordered and wanted to use them on me.

WTF?!?

I’ve only met this guy twice. The first was at a munch and the second at a coffee shop for a drink. Both times he barely said a word which left the conversations more than lacking. I don’t even know why I agreed to meet him after the munch in the first place. It wasn’t because I was interested in dating him. I was skeptical about him from the start, which I told him several times. I need to learn to listen to that skeptical voice and quit giving the wrong people chances they don’t deserve.

I should have known he was off his rocker when I didn’t respond fast enough to a message on FetLife one day and he got perturbed. I said, “You do realize I’m working right now?” His response was, “I don’t realize but I can take an educated guess you are working. After you tell me you are working then it is a realization.” Childish response or what? I don’t know when people expect me to be working my 9-5 office job if not between the hours of 9 and 5. Seriously!

There have been a few times when he has gone off on me because I was too busy to respond to him or meet him. He’s said it’s “logically bullshit” that I am too busy. I got a “you listen to me” as well. Excuse me, what now?

What started the exchange above was him asking me if I was currently sexually involved with someone. I said yes, I have a friend. Well, that lead to him saying how terrible I was, how all those times I was busy I was actually going out with my “fuck buddy or laying on (my) back,” and how do I think someone who wants to date me is going to stick around to get dicked around while I do that. Then he started in on how I’m playing him and he won’t allow himself to be punked or insulted like that. He even tried to tell me what a “lying POS” I am because he’s come to some conclusion that I had a fuck buddy when I was seeing MySir. He doesn’t know any of the details about that relationship and had he asked he would have found out.

I’m not going to defend myself here because anyone who reads my blog or follows me on Twitter will already know the truth, enough of it at least to know that the person he was describing isn’t me. Besides that, he had stated about ten minutes into my first meeting him that he reads my blog and thought it was great. Don’t tell me you do something if you don’t, and don’t pretend to know me when clearly you don’t know anything about me or what I’ve been through these past couple of years.

There’s a bunch more but it all seems so stupid and childish. He pretty much screams immature, unbalanced abuser to me. Verbally attacking me, trying to manipulate me, then minimalizing it all by offering to bring me flowers. An apology and “are we cool?” is going to make it all better and I’m just supposed to forgive and forget? I don’t think so. It’s like the woman who gets hit because her husband had a bad day at the office then he buys her flowers and expects her to forget all about the bruise on her cheek. Not this girl. That is abuse, classic abuse, and I won’t accept it.

I may be in my 40’s and currently single, but I would much rather be alone than with a pathetic, delusional little man who thinks verbally attacking a woman, putting her down and blaming her, is the way to get her. There are plenty of real men, kind and considerate men, out there. One will come my way. And if one doesn’t I still have the best man in the world, my son.

BTW, my favorite color is red.

 

Note: This person has been deleted and blocked on my social media sites. Anyone know if I can block his calls and texts on my cell phone?

 

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Emotion Chart

Stella:

Excellent chart, and not just for writers. We can all use better terms than just happy or sad. Being able to properly express our own feelings and emotions is often a difficult task. This chart reminds me of one of my favorite words, yearn. While still the same general feeling of longing for someone or something, there is a vast difference between wanting them and yearning for them.

Originally posted on John Kutensky:

I came across this and thought it might prove useful for any writers out there.  Enjoy!

Emotion Sheet

View original

Foolish Behaviour?

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Then he said something about how I should have been more cautious, how my life would have turned out very differently if I hadn’t allowed myself to get pregnant by “THAT” kind of guy, and that he doesn’t date or even talk to women with “fuck buddies”. Now, I had told him the whole story about my son’s father on a previous occasion so he already knew how long we had been together and known each other. It isn’t something I like to discuss with people and I don’t do it often, but I was trying to be completely open from the beginning and give this guy a chance. You see how well that worked.

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He continued with a spiel about how I have a fuck buddy (which is not what I said), and how I am a “lying POS” because he can’t follow the concept of an open relationship and having a partner who enjoys seeing and hearing about you being with someone else. Nor can he understand that changing a relationship status on social media does not mean it just happened that very second. To be fair, he would not have seen when I deleted my owned status back at the beginning of the summer only when I changed it to unowned more recently. Although, he did ask me out several times before I added the unowned part.

He says he follows my blog and has read a lot of the comments I’ve made on FetLife. Apparently not enough to know anything about me. I suspect he saw that I wrote this blog, along with the pics that I’ve posted, and wanted to be a part of it. He has only called me by my real name two times that I can see. I even responded with his FetLife name once so he could see how stupid it was. He didn’t catch the hint. The one time I met him for a drink he gave himself the moniker Mr Ten. He said ten because he wanted people to think about why it was Mr Ten rather than Mr X.

Well, here you go Mr X, welcome to the blog!

Mood

 This morning I was in the mood.

 

 

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